I grew up terribly shy. I tried to the best of my ability to stay “normal.” I did everything to appear normal, especially
to my family. But in my seemingly
failing efforts, I knew deep down inside that I was different. Externally, everything around me screamed
normal, below average even. Statistical
data had already painted my life out for me.
Because I was an African American girl raised by a single mother in a
dysfunctional home in a poverty-stricken part of Florida, with siblings that
were technically my “half” siblings…I was to drop out of high school, have a
child not long after dropping out, working at a low end job, having no goals or
aspirations for myself, and living below societal standards. But something in me wouldn’t allow that to
happen. Even through witnessing and
experiencing things no child should ever have to, I felt something deep inside
me, telling me that I was not normal. That there was more to life than where I
was.
Against the odds, I graduated high school (a few
points shy of graduating with honors, darn algebra), enlisted into the U.S.
Army, where I had the honor of serving my country for 14 years with multiple
deployments. I was awarded several
awards, coins, and medals for my service.
I became a homeowner, owned my own vehicle, got married, and had a
beautiful daughter. I defied the
odds. But somehow I still felt I had
conformed to something. I still felt…normal.
Please continue to follow me here…I
promise there’s a point to all of this.
Having accomplished all of what I did, there was
still a deficit. On the other side of my
accolades were turmoil, depression, stress, recklessness, and self abuse. I played Russian Roulette with my life. I fought aimlessly to be seen, to be noticed, and
to be loved. It wasn’t until one unforeseen event after another took place,
including a divorce from my daughter’s father that I realized something was
wrong and if I didn’t get a grip, I would lose.
In desperation, I came to Christ. I ran from Him for so long and I wasn’t sure
He even wanted me anymore. But boy was I
mistaken. He wanted me, ALL of me. The good.
Bad. Ugly. Tore up. Me. In seeking more of God in my life, I learned
that His children AREN’T normal. We are
His “special” children, peculiar some translations describes it. (1 Peter 2:9). Even in my times of living life without God,
I always felt His presence. I couldn’t
articulate it but I always sensed that something was different about my
life. And there was. He was calling me.
Romans 12:2 (NLT) Don’t copy the
behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person
by changing the way you think…
Some of you reading this may have had
the same feelings throughout your life.
As Christians, we live in this world but should not be “of” it. We are called to live differently. We aren’t to conform to the normal standards
of the world. Okay hear me out, rules
and laws are just that. We must abide by
those. And we aren’t to treat being a
Christian with spooky behaviors. What I’m
saying is, instead of trying to fit in with the world, we are called to step
out, up, and represent Christ. Our lives
are to be a representation of the God we serve.
Stepping out of normal requires confidence, strength, and wisdom…all of
which comes from our Father alone. Not
our own philosophies and vain attempts.
What is it that holds you back from
stepping out of normal?
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